It’s okay to be an introvert.
The world has changed, there is no doubt. For how long is anyone’s guess. I think most people agree that things will eventually get back to normal but the question on everyone’s mind is when? When will we return to work, when will we return to being able to see our friends, workout at gyms, go to restaurants, bars, and in general go out in public? When will we be able to go to large events again and not worry that the person gently coughing into their napkin might be carrying a deadly disease? No one really has the answers, we just all keep being as hopeful as we can that the answer will be soon.
Amid these trying times we have all been staying home, working from home, teaching kids from home, and for a lot of people being cramped and living on top of each other. There a ton of resources on social media and in the news on a daily basis offering advice, offering peace and solace, offering help admit these trying times. But what about those of us that are not experiencing these same emotions? What about those of us that are enjoying being home and having time to ourselves? Are we crazy, horrible people? Are we, weird? If you read anything in the media or talk to pretty much anyone, the answer would be yes. Well I am here to tell you no, you are not.
The fact of the matter is that everyone handles things differently and everyone is in a different situation. For some people being at home for this long (even without having to work from home/kids, etc.) would be really trying no matter what, those people are who I like to think of as social butterflies. For others, being alone isn’t that hard. I find myself in the second category. For many working from home is really difficult and I can empathize with that. I don’t think working from home is usually ever ideal except in rare circumstances. I am lucky in that I can do a lot of my job from home (that is, what is left of my job for me to do…). I also don’t have kids, so I am not having to try to teach my kids from home. Again, I empathize with all of you doing this, it sounds very, very difficult. I know you all LOVE your kids, no doubt about that, but most of you aren’t schoolteachers and you have not been prepped to do this, makes total sense. To add to this, I live alone. Now depending on who you talk to that could be a good or a bad thing - my friends have given me the pro’s and cons of this!
However, my biggest problem with the media right now is that everyone assumes that we are all miserable and not coping very well. I see daily messages emphasizing this. Reach out if you need help, make sure you find time for yourself, reflect, self-love, etc. No one is giving us permission to actually be enjoying ourselves. Yes, I realize this is a pandemic, and yes I realize people are dying. I am in no way saying I do not realize the severity of the problem and my heart goes out to the families that have lost loved ones and to the people that are sick and fighting this. But on a daily basis I feel as if I am being made to feel like something is wrong with me because I am not depressed and wanting to kill myself because the stay at home order is not over.
Again, to stress, I am very aware that I have a lot of things going for me. I live in a house, not an apartment, so I have a good amount of room (it’s not a huge house, but it is definitely bigger than my last apartment). I live alone (with my cat Tango). I am working, but my job is somewhat limited. I am naturally an introvert, so being alone is not only easy for me, it is what I tend to do naturally. I have used this time to unpack boxes, I have started writing a book, I’ve had more fun cooking, something I never have time to do under normal circumstances. And I’ve decided to plant a garden (at this point all I’ve done is plant seeds in an egg carton). The point is that I’m actually doing the things most people complain about not ever having the time to do.
If this post made you mad and you are stressed to the nines and you have no time, then I apologize, all the self help posts and articles out there are for you, and I do empathize. I just wanted to write something for the other people out there, the people like me who might be feeling like something is wrong with them because they don’t fit in with how the media is telling us we are supposed to feel. If you are doing ok, there is nothing wrong with you. It does not make you less human or less capable of feeling emotion just because you might not be struggling as much as some other people (outwardly or at all) during this timeframe. It is ok to be taking advantage and landscaping your yard or doing home projects or whatever it is you like. This is a great opportunity to get to know your kids. The point is that there is no right way to handle this. We all handle things differently and there is no one right or wrong way. There is also nothing wrong with being an introvert, so if society is making you feel bad (because it is definitely making me feel like something is wrong with me!) don’t listen. For the first time, maybe ever, we might just have an advantage.